my friend’s been having a difficult time with people misunderstanding her polyamory, so she’s set up a blog to collect posi stories from poly ppl about how it’s not an inherently awful relationship format
In her words:
When we identify as polyamorous or when we are in ethically non-monogamous relationships we hear a lot of people telling us that ‘it will never work’. I wanted to create a space where we could share our positive experiences with each other.
I don’t want to imply that non-monogamous relationships are always easy, but I do want to start to build a picture of the many amazing ways that people are making it work.
I hope that by sharing our stories we can give strength and support to each other. I also hope that it might be a useful resource to share with those in our lives who are struggling to understand how it might work for people (perhaps friends or family members).
Please share your story! Send it through from the Get in touch page.
so yeah, if you’re poly, maybe submit a story?
I like this …
|—||Love hearing people’s coming out stories. So interesting to find out how everyone’s family’s take the news. (via umbrellaless22)|
New video all about my open relationship. Share it about!
Here it is! It’s done, as promised!
A sexual and/or romantic relationship with someone who isn’t your partner, where your partner doesn’t know about it. This type of non-monogamy is not considered ethical as it doesn’t have the consent of all involved.
An arrangement between (usually) heterosexual couples where casual sexual encounters outside the relationship are allowed, within specified boundaries. This requires the consent of all involved.
A type of relationship where partners agree to see others, with consent. This can involve anything from casual hook-ups to long term love affairs. Swinging and polyamory are both types of open relationship.
A relationship style where all partners agree that love is not finite and it is therefore possible to love more than one person. Consent, communication and negotiation of rules/boundaries are key. You can be polyamorous with no serious partners at all, or many.
As with polyamory, but with a closed group. Instead of two people promising to be faithful to each other (as in monogamy), polyfidelity can involve groups of three, four or more who will not venture outside that group romantically or sexually.
Relationships between mono and poly people can be somewhat tricky, but plenty of people manage it, so it’s definitely do-able.
You being poly doesn’t have to mean that your girlfriend is romantically involved with other people if she doesn’t want to be. She can stay monogamous to you if that’s what she wants. However, if you want to be with other people too, that’s when issues might come up. It will take lots of communication and making sure that she’s ok with everything. There’s no reason to stop being poly as long as she is ok with you being with other people, and reassuring her that other relationships don’t diminish your relationship with her.
As long as everything is open and honest and she is happy with you being with other people, then there is no reason to stop being poly. However, if she feels there is absolutely no way she can be happy with you having other partners, then you may need to reevalute whether you can be in a relationship with her - it is a harsh truth, but one that needs considering.
|—||http://adventuresinpoly.tumblr.com/ (via modernpoly)|
Communication followed by action - so if someone says they feel left out, ask them why they feel that way and what would help them not to, and then act on that.
So for example if a partner says that feel left out because you don’t bring them along to parties very often, then you start inviting them along a bit more. And KEEP communicating - make your effort to help make them feel more included, and touch back with them after a while to ask if it’s helped.
I think this is a really good point. It was one of my main worries too, and still is I think. I’ll go over it in detail in the video.
I think one of the main answers to it is the careful use of Google Calender and a lot of communication between partners and metamours.